Six things I learned at 26
I'll spare you the other 20!
Last week, I turned 27. It was tough, just like most of 26 was. Here are a few things I’ve learned this year, and I promise this won’t be like every other inspirational birthday lesson list you’ve seen online.
Natural isn’t always best.
This year, my hair and my home birth experience taught me something surprising: natural isn’t always best.
For months, I stuck with my dark brown hair because it’s my natural color. Isn't it always best to embrace what’s natural? No. I hated it—it didn’t feel like me.
The same goes for my experience with a home birth. “Natural” doesn’t mean things will go as planned or have the picture-perfect ending. Turns out, I like myself better as a blonde, and I’ll be giving birth in a hospital for the foreseeable future. Natural isn’t always best—I learned that in little & big ways this year.
PS: I still deeply respect home birth. It’s beautiful and rooted in how God created birth to be. Birth where you feel led, but know there are risks when you deal with life- no matter where you are.
2. You are stronger than you think.
This year I’ve heard so many women say “I would never be able to survive if something happened to my child.” Hate to break it to you, but I know you’d survive. It would hurt like hell, but you’d make it. Why? Because I did. If I could make it, you will too. I lived through the utter nightmare of having your baby die on my chest. If I made it through that, imagine all the other things I’m capable of?
We’re all stronger than we think. Let’s start living like that.
Fear God
This summer, I experienced holy fear in a way I never had before. It’s comforting to focus on a cozy, warm Jesus who is for us and not against us. But this year, I saw a side of God that isn’t as comfortable to encounter: His power and authority.
I begged God to save my baby. He didn’t.
It’s humbling—and terrifying—to realize just how vast and powerful God is. He can say no to my deepest, most desperate prayers. But in that fear, my faith has grown. God is not just a security blanket for bad times, but the sovereign author of life (even when it doesn’t make sense).
The biggest marketing lie is that nature needs us to add onto it.
Nope. It’s perfect the way it is. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been wowed by the colors of veggies this year. Nature is amazing. God created SO much for us to enjoy, and it’s right at our fingertips?!?!
You don’t need a sauna—get outside.
You don’t need a Peloton—go for a run.
You don’t need processed foods—nature is abundant.
(Okay, so maybe sometimes natural is best?)
If you can’t take the heat, get off the internet
I’ve faced plenty of criticism for sharing my daughter’s story online. Some feedback was fair; most of it was cruel. But I keep sharing because I hope it encourages moms like me—those wondering, Can I survive this? This year taught me the cost of standing up for what I believe in. Being bold has a price, and wisdom is knowing when it’s worth paying.
Nothing matters, actually.
I mean that in the most liberating, encouraging way: 99.9% of what we worry about doesn’t matter. The day before KC was born I was SO stressed about the stupidest stuff. I look back with so much regret. That was the last day I had with her and I was worried about having a button up nightgown for the hospital? I was mad that my husband didn’t text me back in 2.4 seconds? It didn’t matter. None of it did. Most of what consumes us in the modern world is meaningless.
“There are years that ask questions, and years that answer them.” I think that’s how it goes? Either way, this year was full of “What the f*** is happening?”-type questions—pardon my French.
I wish I could change everything about 26, and yet I can’t change a thing. It’s the hardest pill to swallow, and one I must take daily. Twenty-six happened—all the joy, grief, and heartache—and it’s finished.
Onto the next.
With love,
Karissa